Anal sex · Blow jobs · dating · Relationship advice · Selfies · sex advice

Dick Pics and other Things Chicks Hate about Penises!

Dick Pics and Other Things Chicks Hate about Penises
(This is an actual ad that some advertising agency thought was a good idea for Burger King. Heads up, women don’t think about sucking on dicks when we’re hungry, we just want to eat when we’re hungry. Please don’t depict women as cock hungry whores to help sell fast food. I don’t get offended easily, but whoever gave the okay for this ad is an asshole.)

Hey guys, don’t get me wrong, I really like penises.

I think they’re wonderful.

I want to hug them, hold them, kiss them, clean them, sing to them, and give them presents whenever I can.

But PLEASE, and not just for me, but for all penis lovers around the world, follow my below advice, and I can almost guarantee you’ll find your dick in more mouths, vaginas, and butts than ever before.

1. Don’t send unsolicited dick pics.

Unsolicited dick pics are essentially eyeball rape! No one wants to see your dick without warning. Chicks just don’t find Unsolicited dick pics sexy. If you think women just can’t wait to see a pic of your dick, trust me, we can wait.

Only send a dick pic if a chick requests one.

And if you really want to send a dick pic maybe first send a text or DM like this, “Hey girl, let me know if you ever want me to send you a pic of my dick, not sure if you like them or not, but if you do, I can send you one, hope you’re having a great day!”

Maybe she’ll say “yes”, maybe she’ll say “no”, but trust me, she still doesn’t want it, but at least you’re giving her the option.

2. Trim your ball hair

I don’t suck on hairy balls, and trust me, you want your balls sucked while your dick is getting stroked. Nothing kills the mood for a chick getting ready to slurp down on a dick than seeing a pair of balls sporting a ponytail.

You don’t have to shave your balls, a little hair is fine, but groom yourself regularly.

3. Don’t park your dick in my ass unless I give you the garage door opener

Don’t ever think that women want to have anal sex with a guy they don’t love. Some chicks love anal sex, but there are more women in the world that hate anal sex than those that love it.

Most women let you put your dick in their butt because they want to make you happy, but they really don’t want it.

So if you’re trying to sleep with a chick, don’t decide on your own to drop your dick off in their butt. If a chick really wants you to put your penis in their butt they’ll tell you.

4. Don’t have sex with my mouth, my mouth will have sex with your dick

Don’t penetrate a chick’s mouth with your dick unless she’s into that. And just like anal sex, a chick will tell you to “face fuck” her if she wants you to.

If a chick wants to “gag” on your penis then she’ll let you know. Getting a penis jammed down your throat doesn’t feel good, and honestly, it’s kind of a jerk move to do so.

5. If you work at an advertising agency, don’t create ads like the one at the top of this post that depict women as nothing more than cock hungry whores just so your client can sell more burgers and fries.

Okay, those are just 5 things women hate about penises I wanted guys to know about.

Just respect women when it comes to your penis and you’ll find your dick having more fun than ever before.

Maybe you don’t agree with my above advice, but you should, because I’m right.

Let me know what you hate, and what you love, about penises in the comments section if you want to.

Love,

Jenny

XOXOXOXO

Please scroll down and read a few more of my posts if you have time to do so!

Click here to have sex with hot women between the ages of 18 to 25 years old.

Blow jobs · dating · Relationship advice · sex

Quitting Blow Jobs: A Difficult New Year’s Resolution For UK Woman to Keep!

New Years Resolution to stop giving blow jobs

Quitting smoking, or drinking, or losing weight are all New Year’s resolutions most people are familiar with, at least for me they are, but believe it or not, a chick in the UK gave up blow jobs as her New Year’s resolution, but she broke it after just 30 minutes.

I thought I loved the taste of dick more than anyone else, but I guess this chick must love it a lot more since she can’t go 30 minutes without popping a boner into her mouth.

As I was searching Google for 2018’s most popular New Year’s resolutions, I came across a news story that makes me wonder if British penises are more addicting than nicotine or heroin.

Back in 2015 some British chick named Kirsty Maiden was so addicted to the taste of dick that her 2016 New Year’s resolution was, and I quote, “no more blow jobs”, but just 30 minutes into 2016 she already had some dude’s cock in her mouth.

I hope I don’t sound like a slut for saying this, but I need to get my mouth wrapped around a British guy’s dick ASAP to see what the fuss is all about.

Seriously, something must be going on with British dicks if someone can’t go 30 minutes without giving a guy fellatio.

I for one have gone over 7 days in a row, on multiple occasions, without giving a blow job, and I love performing oral sex on men.

Perhaps the sperms of British men get you stoned, or drunk, if swallowed?

I for one always swallow, and I’ve never caught even the slightest of a buzz.

Obviously British sperm can’t get you drunk, but I still want to blow a British guy as soon as possible just to make sure πŸ™‚

Below is a quick list of the most difficult New Year’s resolutions to keep:

10. Find a new job

9. Spend less time on the internet or watching TV

8. Save money

7. Manage Stress

6. Learn something new

5. Get out of debt

4. Spend more time with friends and family

3. Enjoy life more

2. Quit unhealthy habits like smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol

1. Giving out blow jobs, just kidding, it’s actually dieting and exercise

I hope everyone reading this stays strong and keeps their New Year’s resolutions going all year long!

Thanks for reading!

Click here to have sex with hot women between the ages of 18 to 25 years old.

Blow jobs · dating · orgasm · Relationship advice · sex · Swinger's party

Swinger’s Party advice: Give warning before ejaculating on my face πŸ˜•πŸ’¦πŸ†

image

Okay guys, when you’re at a swinger’s party, before unilaterlly deciding to unload your wad onto the gal’s face that’s blowing you, have some common courtesy and maybe say, “I’m gonna cum” at least 4 seconds before you blast in her mouth, her face, or in her hair.

Some gals, even as slutty as myself, don’t want to be peeling off some random guys jizz from her face in the middle of a gang bang.

Let her decide where you’re going to dispose of your spunk.

I’m bringing this up because not one, but two dudes at a recent event ejaculated all over my face and hair without even letting me know what was about to happen.

Call me old fashioned, but I kinda want to decide if I’m going to be blinded by an avalanche of semen or not.

Not cool. Not cool at all πŸ˜•

Blow jobs · dating · sex · sex advice

This is how to make semen taste really delicious πŸ˜˜πŸ†

image
My Instagram Account is @natesjenny24
-Please Click Here To Follow Me-

Love giving head but hate swallowing the load? Guys, do you want your woman to swallow your load everytime?

Okay, so I really love giving head, but I love tasting and swallowing cum more than sucking on an erection . But I get it that most women aren’t fans of “swallowing”. Maybe it’s the texture, maybe it’s the taste, maybe you’re not sure if it’s safe…but trust me, you can’t get pregnant by “swallowing”.

Now, texture of semen can’t be changed, but the taste of semen can be helped if you get your man to do the following:

1.) Stop smoking cigarettes. Smoking can make spunk taste grody to the max.

2.) Alcohol helps with getting the courage to place a huge penis in your mouth, but alcohol will make your man’s giant weiner blow out some funky tasting jizz. So don’t eat a load a day after a night of heavy drinking.

3.) Make him eat some celery. Celery is high in water and vitamin C and can clear the semen of what might be making his celery stick juice taste nasty.

4.) Smoking weed will not only get your lover high, it will also make his cum taste like a glass of crap.

5.) No more Starbuck runs. His coffee with cream is making the cream in his penis taste like sour milk in your mouth. So cut out coffee and even caffeine.

6.) Cut out dairy! Milk might do a body good, but it makes creamy jizz taste like a bag of hot farts.

7.) Drink cranberry juice. This will balance pH levels and will make you want to drink a glass full of his semen if you’re extremely thirsty…okay, a glass of even the tastiest semen will not go down well, but cranberry juice really does help!

8.) Cut out red meat. Steaks taste great, but the jizz blasting into your mouth from his meat bone will make you want to spit out his load just as fast as he exploded it into your mouth.

9.) Avoid these vegetable please: cauliflower and cabbage. Not only will his cum taste like dead fish guts, but will also make him blast out some nasty farts. Kill two birds with one stone!

10.) Cut out fast food. An Inn-And-Out burger will sour the ketchup coming out of his French fry!

11.) Eat lots of asparagus! I’m totally kidding here. We all know that asparagus will make any load taste worse than a hot bowl of turd shanks. PLEASE know that I’m kidding here. NO ASPARAGUS EVER!!!

As soon as your man makes these changes you will be more than happy sucking down every single drop of your man’s love juice.

Have fun having fun please!

My Instagram Account is @natesjenny24
-Please Click Here To Follow Me-